Think about the guidelines and study the supporting Scripture verses. Rate yourself on each of these items: Excellent (3), Good (2), Fair (1), Poor (0)

1. Be a ready listener and do not answer until the other person has finished talking (Prov. 18:13; James 1:19). __________

2. Be slow to speak. Think first. Don’t be hasty in your words. Speak in such a way that the other person can understand and accept what you say (Prov. 15:23, 28; James 1:19). __________

3. Don’t go to bed angry! Each day clear the offenses of that day. Speak the truth always, but do it in love. Do not exaggerate (Eph. 4:15, 25; Col. 3:8; Matt. 6:34). __________

4. Do not use silence to frustrate the other person. Explain why you are hesitant to talk at this time. (Prov. 15:28; 16:21, 23; 10:19; 18:2; Col. 4:6; Prov. 20:15). __________

5. Do not become involved in quarrels. It is possible to disagree without quarreling (Prov. 17:14; 20:3; Rom. 13:13; Eph. 4:31). __________

6. Do not respond to uncontrolled anger. Use a soft and kind response and tone of voice (Prov. 14:29; 15:1; 25:15; 29:11; Eph. 4:26, 31). __________

7. When you are in the wrong, admit it and ask for forgiveness and ask how you can change (James 5:16; Prov. 12:15; 16:2; 21:2, 29; 20:6; Matt. 5:23 – 25; Luke 17:3). __________

8. When someone confesses to you, tell him/her you forgive him/her. Be sure it is forgiven and not brought up to the person, to others, or to yourself! (Prov. 17:9; Eph. 4:32; Col. 3:13; 1 Pet. 4:8). __________

9. Avoid nagging (Prov. 10:19; 17:9; 16:21, 23; 18:6, 7; 27:15; 21:19). __________

10. Do not blame or criticize the other person. Instead, restore … encourage … edify (Rom. 14:13; Gal. 6:1; 1 Thess. 5:11). __________

11. If someone verbally attacks, criticizes, or blames you, do not respond in the same manner (Rom. 12:17, 21; 1 Pet. 2:23; 3:9). __________

12. Try to understand the other personís opinion. Make allowances for differences (Prov. 18:2, 13, 15; Phil. 3:15, 16). __________

13. Be concerned about the interests of others (Phil. 2:3; Eph. 4:2; Rom. 12:15). __________

(Proverbs 18:21; 25:11; Job 19:2; James 3:8 – 10; 1 Peter 3:10; Ephesians 4:25 – 32)

from Homework Manual, by Dr. Wayne Mack